Amma, Avakai, Ammai, Amerika!!!

Hi everyone in dreamland...

I said dreamland coz a very respectable 'Guru' once said that one's homeland is his dreamland... And for those of you not in your homeland (like poor old me) I believe we always live in a dreamland....

There are many things in your life which influence it on a daily basis. But there are only a few things which influence it well enough to change it forever.

AMMA - Mother - The supremely divine creation of god so as to prevent his loss to every living creature, Man, animal, monkeys and all those stuck in between them.

I think it would be really stupid of anyone not to know the value of mothers (Even those who are unfortunate enough to have them with them know their value even more). I think it is the first major influence on your life even before you know the meaning of influence, let alone its spelling.

If you are really fortunate enough to hear and understand and follow everything your mother says (not that I ever did it) you would be doing something else with your life than you ever imagine you would. I know that everyone comes to know this only after there is absolutely no chance of reversing what you have ever done, or not done should I say.

AVAKAI - Pickle - A traditional south Indian spicy preserve ideally made with mangoes and which gives a distinct feeling of an erupting volcano in your mouth should you be eager enough to gulp it down greedily.

I know it is really stupid of me to mention avakai as an influencing factor in one's life. But as every andhrawala will vouch for you will definately never forget its taste even if you are daily entitled to a kings meal. And mostly you will always want the one thing you have the least chance of getting. So living in this crazy country where they say it is hot with the faint trace of sunlight and where they scream at the touch of a chilli flake to their tongue, I dont think I am crazy to be craving for avakai. Besides think of me as a glutton among thousands of others.

AMMAI - Girl - A species of utmost miraculous capabilities which immediately reverse the evolution process of the opposite gender and instantly transform him to primitive Mokeys.

I think most of the great people reading this blog have only come reading this far hoping to find some intresting topic at this point or have suudenly jolted back from their trance which may have been caused due to my philosophical sh*t which only reinforces my belief as to why I think this is an influencing factor in your... sorry our life.

Imagine living in an area without any girls...I mean only young and beautiful girls.... first it sounds like... oh my god its terrible!!, then it starts to feel like... wow! is it really possible... hmm... paradise at last!!!... then suddenly you scream... Pleeease! somebody wake me from this nightmare....!!!

I Don't think it is not possible to imagine its existance... I think I consider me and my friends lucky in some aspects as we were educated in a school where girls were there.... and not there.... they were the invisible creatures.. and trying to spot them was considered as a crime of a level only next to trying to overthrow the governement...... That made most of us forget about the existence of any trace of beauty in the opposite sex and get lost in our Idle world.... Well, almost for everyone... There were some of the brave rebels in existance in our clan who considered it their birthright to have a freedom of speech and acquaintance with them mystery creatures. Not even the most cunning commanders could deter them from their goal...

But lets not turn our discussion to those... um.... unfortunates. I am sure they would now agree to the disadvantages of bringing girls and heart together.

AMERIKA - The world collectively given by me to any international destination away from India and not to insult the USA or to exert its dominance over the rest of the poor countries. Almost everyone reading this will agree with me that this definitely is an influencing factor in their life, even if they were never interested about it in the first place. The reason I said this was because all of you reading this are educated and all educated young people are either interested to go abroad or forced to go there by their family of would be family ( who else.... AMMAI ).

But Is it only me who always feels that even If I have everything I wanted to live for including money to be here I always miss my country. People might ask whats there in India to miss it for. It looks beautiful but it is rotten inside. But are we so different, we struggle to look beautiful outside but.... u know the rest.....

        Well then enough of the influencing factors.... you might wanna ask "OK we all know the factors.. but why are you telling this to us... its supposed to be a blog about your life".

Come to think of it, why am I in this situation where I am writing this stuff when I used to have so much interest in writing as getting my teeth drilled by a dentist. Yup I will tell you.

My life was not so special but it was special to me. I had some great friends and lazy life. It was cool and any  person to complain about it was a fool ( wah wah... see, I told you I was a poet and now you can see it ). The only influencing factor I had then was AVAKAI... No amma, No ammai and definately not Amerika.

Then came a cool, lovely and beautiful day when I joined my college full of dreams embedded into me by some very colorful movies showing some extremely wrong angles of it which were later expelled from my empty head with the help of a hard bottle which was not so empty flung from the hands of many angry species which were full of nonsense and which had absolutely no sense who used to call themselves lecturers when the only lecture they ever used to give was as fascinating as watching the art of pig culture in doordarshan.

So why am I telling about college... coz here was the next influencing factor which came gift wrapped in a beautiful blue dress... AMMAI. No Avakai ( people in love are not hungry...), No Amma, and not yet Amerika.

Life was still cool.... in fact my brain was frozen with love at sub-zero temperatures in one of the hottest cities of the south where people who went out like cheerful pigeons came back as tandoori chickens. Then started the quest for success.... the ultimate goal of winning the girls heart... which led to another goal of graduating successfully... which led to the goal of going abroad.... which led to the goal of attaining a job there... which led to the goal of convincing the girls parents..... which will ultimately lead to marriage with same girl who by then will say.... "Do you know how much I did for you".

If I would have tried my luck in football I think I might have set up my first international league in India.

What happened next is a no-brainer.... AMERIKA.... the next and the last influencing factor. Now I am here and the AMMAI for whom I tried to make this possible says "You changed a lot, you are not like the person I first met" which makes me to think,

Amma ledhu, Avakai ledhu... ika Ammai kuda lekapothe nenu Amerika vachhi em laabham....

( Aasa poina, prasa migilindhi )....

Adios people......

Actually, Where is my life going???

Hi everyone in yonder land,


Yonder land.... wonderland..... neverland..... whatever..... 


As a child I always used to wonder (when we were all faced with the mundane and long lost ordeal of facing the daily English classes which did not even have the smallest glimmer of interest and absolutely no hope of ever attaining any) about why did Shakespeare spell English to an utterly ridiculous level of usage which almost nearly sounded like French, about which I admit I had as much knowledge as Barrack Obama had about Bommidala Pulusu. But I could almost certainly have vouched for that it was not English let alone one worth praising to a throat swelling level about. 


The same experiment of modifying English to sound like French or Spanish or German or konkini when tried by me in my term examinations  almost always met with the same results- my friends ending up laughing on the floor and our highly talented and junior Shakespeare Mr. Vaakpati Raju (who had the extreme privilege and once in a lifetime task of teaching an absolutely out of the world - both literally and practically - batch of students) praising Bharath or should I tell Balath or Bhagath that " For the shameless face smile is only ornament ", of course our dear Mr. cowsick would be kind enough to translate into telugu as something like - "Sigguleni mokhaniki navve  singaram".


I learnt a valuable lesson then, Some things do not pay to be imitated upon. And, edava pani nuvvu chesina, topic pakkavaadipaina divert cheyyatam nerchuko.


Gone are those good old days when life was full of fun. Not because it was an atmosphere suiting fun, but fun adapted to forget the atmosphere. They were days when doing wrong was not considered heroic, but people who get caught doing the wrong thing colourfully handed and beaten even more colourfully but never even came close to admitting it  considered heroes. Those were THE times when freedom fighters were in the heart and movie stars on the lips. Patriotism was in the brain, but being as rebels to the school was even more cool.


Now where actually are we standing? The same people who once said and believed " Snehame ra pranam, Snehame na jeevitham " are now actually begging " Darling, Nee kanna naaku evaru ekkuva cheppu. Nee Kosam naa pranam aina plate lo petti isthaanu ( seasoning optional ) ". Enti ra veedu sudden ga intha philosophy start chesaadu anukovaddu. Enduku ante idhi oka rakam ga philosophy ee.


Edho life lo ala kulli jokulu vesukuntu ala gadipesaanu, ippudu choosthe life ee pedda joke la aipotundi and adhi almost kulli pothund,i paiga aa kulli potunnadaani chuttu eegalu okati. 


On the outside antha baagane undhi.... kaani enduko life lo aim chesinantha santhosham ledhu... evado okadu annadu " premisthe daaniki minchina aanandam ledhu ani ". But naa experience lo nenu eppudu adhi evedi deggere choodaledhu... chala chala gaadam ga love chesi sakam jeevitham dobbinchi kunna vaadi deggere kuda ". Love chesina naa prathi edava friend ki help chesanu, adi ento naaku chala edava friends unnaru. Actually naaku unna vaalla lo almost andaru valle. Daani lo sagam mandhi paigaane love lo munigi anatomy lab lo exhibit skeleton la paiki telaru. Ippudu enti ra ila ayyindhi ante " nijam ga premisthe daaniki minchina aanandam ledhu ra " ane antaaru, kaani bonus ga " lovers pette torture kanna doola emi ledhu ra " antaaru . 


Sarle paapam ammayilu andaru inthe anukundaama ante, naaku unna girl friends ( not girlfriends, there is a minute but vast difference between them which I am sure can be put forward as a perfectly simple and logically deducible sentence with a clear and pristine meaning as GIRL's who are my friends) ki kuda adhe situation. Enti ra idhi iddariki ilaage undhi ani brain ni baaga train chesi strain chesaanu, almost manchi 'palle velugu' bus ni anakapalli road lo 120kmph speed lo drive chesthe andulo unna passengers ki vaachinantha vaachindhi. Chivariki ilanti simple vishayalu naa lanti serious brain ki artham kaavu ani vadilesanu. Aa taravatha love anna vaadiki toolu teesanu. 


Aina kaalam kalisi raakapothe, naalanti pillalu chesedhi emi untundhi?. One fine morning naa life lo golden days aipoyayi..... harsha gaadu prema lo paddadu!!!


Taravatha emundhi, 3 days happy... then start problems....


Ani paatha kota srinivas rao dialogue kodathaanu anukunnra.... antha ledhu.... love ni mariiii antha comedy ga teseyakandi.... enduku ante " premisthe daaniki minchina aanandam ledhu ". Avunu, ee dialogue kodotunnadhi nene.... Kaani prati aanandaaniki venaka oka dukkham karchitanga untundhi..... enti ra veedu intha scene chestunnadu tokkalo oka love story vesukoni ani choodaddu.... evadi gola vaadiki Geetanjali!!!


Naa geetanjali eppudu 5 years back modalu ayyindhi.... andulo modati 2 years 'Mounamelanoyi', Interval lo 'Devedas' ( with mandu episode ) and next 2 years 'premichukundam ra' nadichindi... ippudu oka title leni Mani Ratnam movie nadustundi, climax varaku em jarugutundho artham kaadu.....!!! 


Nijam cheppali ante naaku tanante pranam, chala chala.... raktam chindinche antha pranam.... Ottu.... arey, eppudu lenidhi blood kuda donate chesenu ante raktham chindinche antha pranam unnatte kada.... nammandi... idhi emi punch dialogue kaadu... Naa pancha pranala nundi vachhe dialogue.... ( see, I am a poet, and now I can prove it ).


Kaani em cheayamantaaru.... andari dhisti tagilindhi.... kalasi melasi undaalisina jeevitham kampu kodutundhi..... ( appudappudu ).....


Actually its not bad because of anyone.... but due to me.... ya, maybe I made a bit too many of sacrifices. Maybe I did not give too much of time for her to understand me.... Maybe I was and am really the reason to blame for her feeling that I am not understanding her.... 


Sakam karanam nooti doola..... saradaga joke chesi chesi... ippudu em cheppina mundu '' cha... nijam cheppu '' antaadi.... emaina ante.... '' nenu saradaga annanu ra.... naaku eppudu nee medha doubt ledhu antaadhi ''. 


Actually I knew from before hand itself from my dear friend Pawan Kalyan and almost similar friends in my childhood that '' aaduvaari maatalaku arthaale veerule '' ani.... but evadu avi mari intha teda ani cheppaledhu enti ra.... 


One moment its '' Life rocks '' and the next moment its '' The Pursuit of Happiness ''.


Rooju antha baagane untundhi.... sudden ga enduko oka perfectly justified reason ki naaku kopam vastundhi... Appudu tanu vachhi emi teliyanattu ga oka innocent face petti '' emi ayyindhi '' ani adugutaadhi.... Manam paatha eastman colour movie lo hero laaga emi maatladam.... paiga mokham oka angle lo pedatham... Adhi emaina signal anukunta, ventane tanu aa scene nundi walkout chestundhi... emayyindhi ra ani nuvvu aalochinche lope tanu naa medha alaka modalu pedutundhi.... Idhi kudirithe konni gantalu, lekapothe oopika unte kooni roojulo avutundhi.....


Appudu manalo unde oka almost romeo antha amara premikudu aalochinchi, tana medha kopaanni tyagam chesi tanani bratimaladadam start chestaadu and tanamedha tane kulli jookulu kuda vesukuntaadu, chance dorikithe thittukuntaadu kuda.... aina tanalo juliet baaga dobbi tini padukuntundhemo, appude bayatapadadu..... konni gantala taravatha thanu sudden ga, oka milky face petti, moist eyes tho '' it's alright '' ani antaadhi, paiga nee joke ki oka chinni navvu istundhi kuda... daanitho nijam ga ( really, truly ) nee gunde jallumantundhi..... edho appude neeku edho microsoft lo partnership istunnantha anandamga face pedathaavu.....


Ala konni gantala taravatha nee daddi brain ki eppudo powercut taravatha current vachhinattu oka bulb velugutundhi... '' Intaki ippudu tappu naadha leka tanadha '' ani??. Idhe question tanani adagaleka, nuvvu mingaleka appatiki migilina konni hairs ni peekkoleka... ponile ani nee nooti dula aagaleka oka vela tanani adigeve anuko..... tanu ninnu ventane serious ga face petti '' asalu appudu emi jarigindho cheppu '' ani tanaki assalu gurthulenattu adugutundhi.... appatike dobbina nee brain ki kottaga 'Short term memory loss' kuda vachhi neeku adhi tinnamga gurthuku raaledhu anuko...


Appudu kothi chethiki kobbari chippa dorikinattu tanu ninnu oka oopu ooputundhi '' nuuvu eppudu inthe... nannu assalu artham chesukovu '' ani... Neeku 'I Love You' cheppataaniki enni roojulu teesukundo kaani, ventani 'I Hate You ani maatram chebutundhi..... Dannitho neeku malli tension start.....


Inni tensions lo neeku sudden ga oka fine day eppudaina nuuvu haapy lenappudu, neeku nee lover okka kshanam ( adhi kuda kashtame ) gurthuku raanappudu neeku vachhe oke okka question " Actually, Where is my life going?? ". Appudu tanu edho nee mind ni read chestunnattu " Oye, nuvvu maatram life lo settle avvakapothe mana pelli kashtam " ani antaadhi. 


Avunu " lovers pette torture kanna doola emi ledhu "............!!!!!!!!


Idhi prastutaaniki naa paristithi.... Koncham Ishtam, Koncham Kashtam..... Kaani vadili velthe naake nashtam..... ( see, I am really a poet, and now I can again prove it ).


hmm..... so, mari ika kada kanchiki, nenu naa kalalloki....!!!